


I Don't Know You Anymore

by SilverBlaze85



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, h/c bingo fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-26
Updated: 2013-01-26
Packaged: 2017-11-26 23:13:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/655442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverBlaze85/pseuds/SilverBlaze85
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve Rogers is slowly losing himself to Captain America.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Don't Know You Anymore

**Title:** I Don't Know You Anymore  
 **Word Count:** 577  
 **Fandom:** Avengers  
 **Rating:** PG  
 **Warnings:** None that I know of.  
 **Summary:** Steve Rogers is slowly losing himself to Captain America.

 

 

* * *

 

  
Some days, he wonders if Steve Rogers died in the ice, passed away like a ghost in the fog as the Howling Commandos grew older and passed away. He wonders if the slow decay didn’t start with Bucky’s death, as crippling and painful as the loss of an arm.

Bucky knew him, knew _Steve_ , from before… before the serum, before the health, before the title Captain. Bucky knew the sickly and weak Steve, helped keep an eye out for him while his Mom tried desperately to make ends meet, and then sheltered him like a momma swan with her cygnet under her wing after the worst happened. Bucky didn’t change his approach, still badgered and hounded and critically eyed Steve when the smoke caught up to him, making his breath rattle in his lungs for a few moments before the serum kicked in and started reversing it. The rank of Captain didn’t phase Bucky in the least, and Steve loved him even more for it.

So much more now, though. Now it’s ‘Captain Rogers’, and while he can understand it and doesn’t mind it from the Army, from SHIELD, where’s a classification of rank and title, it rankles when Tony calls him ‘Cap’ as they pass in the halls of the Tower, when Tony sneaks and switches his ringtone to “Star Spangled Man With A Plan”. Tony’s not SHIELD, not Army, not with any militia, and it’s not a title, it’s a nickname, and it rubs Steve the wrong way.

He contemplates mentioning this sometimes, telling one of the shrinks that Fury keeps pushing at him, but even he knows how it would sound. “ _Sometimes, I think that Captain America is taking over and he did away with Steve Rogers, because nobody remembers the man under the suit, remembers the sick kid from Brooklyn that still got in fights like a little terrier, and it kind of depresses me, but then I get pissed about the whole thing, and take it out on a sandbag.”_ Because, you know, that sounds so healthy. It’s the truth though… It’s like the serum slowly ate away at Steve while he was under the ice, eating away the boy under the suit, and he’s not sure anymore how to get that back.

The rest of the team, hell, the rest of the modern _world_ , knows Captain America. Knows the blue, white and red uniform, knows the resounding ring of his shield, knows he stands for what’s pure and right and does his best by Lady Liberty, even if they think him a relic from ages past. Nobody seems to remember Steve, the kid who secretly likes sauerkraut on his dogs, even if it’s not called liberty cabbage anymore; who finds the traditions of the Catholic Church, which haven’t changed one bit, to be a balm to his mind and soul; who still loves a dish of coddle when it’s cold out, even it doesn’t quite taste like his Mom’s. The diner a few streets down has an excellent pastie recipe, but he’s taken up baking, because he’s yet to find a soda bread that tastes quite right.

It hurts, knowing that for all intents and purposes, Steve Rogers has been eclipsed and buried by Captain America, but when he sits on the landing platform at the top of the tower, the brisk wind carrying the sounds of the city up to him, he’s not sure how to go about fixing it.  



End file.
